Plant Killer Among Other Things

I've never done this before, been in this place, had this vantage point. It's extremely interesting. It's this MOTB gig, I'm talking about.

I would liken it to a science-fiction movie where, let's say, a person has to walk through a wall of mysterious goo to get to another world. (I think I saw this kind of scene in Stargate or Contact, or some movie like that). Anyway, you walk through this wall of goo and it feels weird and it's a little scary because you don't know what it might do to you. Part of you doesn't want to go through it but another part is driving you to do it to see what's on the other side.

One of the things that I find very interesting (and very familiar) is the revelations that my daughter is coming to while we walk through this wall of goo. She said the other day, "I thought when I got engaged I would feel different somehow, I would be a different person. But it's still me with my same hair, my same face, my same feelings."

It brought to mind the movie French Kiss with Meg Ryan where she says, "No matter what I might seem like tonight, it's still the same old me from yesterday you wind up with tomorrow."

And after 29 years of marriage, (coming up on) 49 years of life, I'm still a plant killer among other things.

And Steave is fine with that.

He didn't used to be. Then he quit fighting me. Then he laughed at me. Now, I think it's endearing to him, my little quirk.

So, yesterday he bought me a palm tree, taller than I am. Just so I could kill it. Being only $12 that made it a bit easier.

Maybe on the other side of the wall of goo I won't be a plant killer among other things. Haha! Wishful thinking.

In a Cloud of Nostalgia

"I feel like I've never had a home, you know? I don't know exactly where I fit in... There's always this kind of nostalgia for a place, a place where you can reckon with yourself."
~Sam Shepard

That's me on the far right with my hand on my hip. I can't remember if this is my high school graduation party or my 18th birthday.

I dreamed the other night that I was giving my daughter a tour of the house I grew up in. I was very excited to show her all the little details that were interesting to me - the glass doorknobs, the pushbutton light switches, etc.

I'm putting together a little cookbook for Katie with recipes from family and friends and including little stories and memories in it.

My last child's upcoming wedding marks the end of a chapter and the beginning of another.

I found an old friend on facebook. A flood of memories came back of the time right before that picture above was taken. In looking through his photographs, I was reminded of North Carolina beaches and Calabash seafood, the best in the world.

See. I'm in a cloud of nostalgia.

I always struggle (and anyone who reads my blog or hears me talk knows ad nauseum) with feeling like I belong. I am very jealous of those who can say: "I am from..." and you can see it in them, you can hear it in their speech, you can see traces of it in what they do.

I want to feel like I belong somewhere. I was born, raised and grew up in NC but I never felt like I fit in there. When I moved to GA I felt more at home with the people here, but I still feel like an outsider. 

I want to go "home" and sit and think about what I've done and where I've been. I want to reckon with myself.  

Fabric Rosettes

I need inspiration to jump off my creative engine. So I often grab a craft, art, house decorating magazine and flip through it real fast. If something catches my eye, I stop and consider it. So, in essence, yes, I am influenced by a great photo, interesting type style and color. So, I flipped through a magazine recently and these pages caught my eye...

The colors intrigued me as well as the "messiness" of the rosettes.

So, I had to try my hand at making these little flowers. I thought we could use them in different ways in the wedding decor.

I had a scrap of fabric and so I cut it into strips...

and while the color is good and would probably make a very pretty flower, we have this vintage, antique thing going so I tea dyed the strips...

it reminded me of noodles....

then I hung them out to dry.

I was hoping for a more mottled look. I thought it would add depth and interest to the flowers. So I took my handy-dandy distressing ink pad and ran it over the strips.

Then I started twisting and rolling them into rosettes, gluing them at strategic points, being careful of the hot glue. Nothing worse than a hot glue burn!

You can add beads and ribbon if you like...

I liked the result so much I tried a burlap rosette.

I think these will add nice little details to the wedding decor.

Checking Off The "To Do" List

This is the wedding to do list. I had to get it out of my head and on to something. So, this list includes EVERYTHING I can think of. It's handy and helpful to me mentally to see things crossed off!

I ordered a couple of floating lanterns to see what they were like. Since the wedding will be beside a lake, we thought these would be cool to have as the sun is going down. Katie and I test drove one in the tub last night.

It is very fun! We'll be getting more!

Words

Back in the day I had a friend who was like a soul-mate to me. Not in a physical way but in a soul way. We just understood each other, connected, you know - all those things you say about a person that you feel really close to in a mental and emotional way.

Well, he was interested in the theatre as was I and he told me that he wanted to produce "The Belle of Amherst" and cast me as Emily Dickinson. So, I read the play and began to study it a bit before life slipped in and buried poor Emily under a pile of obligations and miles of separation.

I had great fun learning those lines and memorizing her poems. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to play her, I think I could have done her justice.

There was one line that I thought of today: "I love words" she says. "There are words to which I lift my hat when I see them sitting on a page … ‘Circumference'... and 'Phosphorescence' now there's a word to lift your hat to."

I agree with her. I love words, too. And I'm always so pleased to come across a string of words that make me happy. I found a string today. I am happy.

Friends and Fleas

So, yesterday Katie, Cindy  and I went out to do a little wedding brainstorming/shopping. Our friend, Madeleine invited us over to her house to "shop" through her stuff to see if there was anything we would like to use for Katie's wedding. She had thrown her daughter a backyard wedding at their home and had some things that Katie and I had been talking about.

She had a LOT! We're borrowing some shepherd hooks and glass jars to hang from the hooks and in trees.

We're going to have just plain old jars, but I wanted to show you a shepherd hook in case you didn't know.

She also had these silver trays that she painted with chalkboard paint to write food choices on. We borrowed those...

She also had a bag of umbrellas, how smart is that!!

There were many other things that she had but I won't go through the long list of it all. After we rummaged around at her house, she took us to lunch at la Madeleine's a lovely French Country eatery and bakery. My sister and I used to go and I remembered the real butter and cream flavor of the chicken pot pie...they didn't have it, but I got quiche Lorainne and some potato soup (there was the real butter and cream flavor I was looking for!)

Madeleine then treated us all to dessert, she got a variety of things: lemon, fruit and creme brulee tarts, chocolate parfait and my favorite, chocolate chip cookie. After lunch, she took us to a great shopping center filled with catalog/online stores. They are the stores that I very rarely see except in catalogs and online. We went to Williams Sonoma and Pottery Barn. They are great inspiration stores. I usually don't want to pay their prices, so I look and try to reproduce in a cheaper way. We were able to get a few ideas.

Madeleine then took us to some great second hand shops where we got more jars and silver trays and books for next to nothing. One of the stores is called "The Classy Flea." It is fabulous! There were windows and shutters and all sorts of fodder for artistic inspiration. Too many ideas, too little time!!

It was a great day!

The Rolling Stones, Airports and Kidneys

The title sums up my day yesterday.

A friend of mine, younger than me, is in need of a kidney transplant. I went with her sister yesterday and hung out with them in waiting rooms at Emory while she was having some tests done. We went out to lunch and laughed enjoying those little pleasures that you do when life gets entirely too weird.

It reminded me of the days when my life was consumed by doctor's visits, hospital stays, medical tests, scary moments when my sister was terminally ill. Little things like a good sandwich and a laugh till you cry were the best gifts you could get during those days.

She looked good, the circumstances around this kind of thing are as good as they get and there is hope and health to look forward to.

Later in the day I went to pick up Mike at the airport. We had an easy pickup, right on time, a good dinner and some good conversation about current events, theology and of course Dallas' win over Miami.

In the evening I pulled out my newest Netflix choice: Shine a Light, a participant in my Summer Concert Series. I decided on it because Katie had asked me a question about Keith Richards and I thought it would be fun to see this Martin Scorsese movie/video thing.

I was disappointed. I've never been a huge Rolling Stones fan and I had hoped there would be a lot of history and footage from bygone days. There was some, but there was more recent concert footage. I hate to say it, but they're pretty boring. Maybe they were more entertaining when they were younger. But they all looked like they needed a good nap and a visit with their grandkids. The guitars sounded like I do when I play Rock Band. So, I fast forwarded through it and caught the little snippets of black and white footage of their glory days.

Today, Katie is home from Texas and the wedding planning shall recommence. I'm looking my eyes out at wedding photography websites this morning and will be securing porta-potties this afternoon.

Hope you have a lovely day!

MOTB: Wedding Favors

I'm not a good sick person. I don't like to be still, however, during my recuperation I have forced myself to stay housebound. It wasn't hard to do because I really did feel pretty bad, but not bad enough to stay in bed, just in the house, in my pj's piddling around doing this and that.

And of course, the "this and that" has been focused around the wedding. Now, I have to admit my ignorance: I don't really "get" some of the stuff that goes on in and around weddings. One thing, for example, I don't understand yet I feel bound to do are the wedding favors. What is the purpose? Are we thanking the guests for coming? Are we giving them a little something out of pity to say, "I know this day wasn't about you, but here's a little something so you don't feel left out"? "Is it a souvenir of the day?" What is it for?

No matter what it's for, I feel obliged to include it amongst our other responsibilities. So, we've decided to do a Candy Bar. I've seen it and have enjoyed it at other weddings and it seemed simple enough to do, so by golly that's what we're doing.

So, after looking around I finally settled on some glass containers that I found at Ikea

We decided on 6 different kinds of candy, so I got two sets of 3 containers. We'll fill them and have scoops and tongs to get the candy out with.

The guests will then put the candy in little brown "penny candy" bags. I always loved these little brown bags because every Saturday my Dad and I would go to the hardware store and he always needed some nails or screws and I loved to count them out and put them in the little bags. Those are the kinds of memories you have when you're raised by a carpenter!

Sorry for the flashback....anyway, I then printed out some pretty, little labels and then promptly dirtied them up with some distress ink to give them a little antique vintage look.

And that's our wedding favor. Pretty easy.

Summertime

Well, I am out of school and am fighting a sinus infection. I guess it's my annual crash after the year. Teaching 6th grade is pretty demanding in the way that one must always be "on." You can't let your guard down, you have to stay one step ahead, thinking of what might happen as well as dealing with what is happening. You have to keep all the plates spinning because if you're not making it happen - they will make something happen. You have to keep the fences mended, immediately repair any chinks in your armor and never let them see your weaknesses. So, when I get a break, I usually crash. And I crashed pretty hard this year. It was a hard year.

As soon as school was out I jumped head first into wedding planning mode. We already felt pretty rushed since the wedding is going to be at the end of October, but when we saw a schedule of what should be done and when, well, we got really rushed.

However, my sinus infection and Katie's visit to Texas for a few days has given me a chance (or rather forced me) to slow down for a minute. For the past two days I've been laying on the sofa reading Patti Smith's book, Just Kids.

It's about the relationship that she had with the artist Robert Mapplethorpe during the 60's and 70's. I never knew of Patti but saw a late night interview with her months ago and couldn't shake her. Later I read a Vanity Fair article about Johnny Depp, found the writing style interesting and was suprised to find that Patti had written it. So, when I saw the book at Urban Outfitters I felt that it was destiny and had to get it.

It was pretty depressing and at times disgusting with the sex, drugs, rock and roll, lice and sexually transmitted diseases. It was intriguing in how much they sacrificed for their art. It took guts and a lot of arrogance to believe in yourself that much. I'm am thankful that she romanticized their lives because if she had been more realistic I don't think I could have read it. So, thanks Patti for the "prettied-up" version.

Plowing through their dirty NY apartments did have its rewards, though. She rubbed elbows with many great artists of the 60's such as Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Sam Shepherd and Andy Warhol.  I came away feeling slightly grossed out and slightly inspired. It was refreshing in a way to delve into a world where the most important thing in life was creating art. I can't live there but it was a nice mental vacation.

I've pulled out my concert DVD's, ordered a couple of new ones and am throwing myself a "Summer Concert Series." I watched "The Eagles" last week and Imogen Heap came and watched her this week. She is one of the most creative and innovative musicians I have ever seen or heard. If you don't know her, check her out.

I just got a Jack Johnson DVD yesterday and I can't wait to watch that.

I had a bit of a scare recently. I lost all the files on my computer. Thankfully Jerry and Steave found them. They were hiding. I was worried because I thought I had lost the novel that I wrote for Katie when she was in Toccoa. Of any of my stories, that would be the one I might dare to try to have published. I found it and it lies there, resting until I have the energy to go back and clean it up.

However,  I have been able to write a couple of chapters of another novel that's in the works. Over the past several years I've written 2 versions of it and threw them both out. Maybe I'll be happy with #3.

I'm feeling the pull to take pictures! I think I want to get "Photoshop for Dummies" and learn a little about the "modern darkroom."

And amongst all my grand plans and schemes I hope to be blogging more. It is the summer after all!